Well, here we go, and there's a lot of hate to go around. As a wise man once said:
Don't know if the following rant will be of any entertainment value to any of you, but my therapist says it should do me a world of good.
For starters:
People/things I should hate but don't
Darian Durant - jerk move, but him leaving freed up cash and landed us Bighill, so the love points balance out the hate. I'm good with it.
Gary Bettman - Phoenix and Florida are flops and Carolina is pretty poor (chalk a lot of that up to lousy arena locations as much as anything), but hockey is big in the non-traditional markets of Dallas, San Jose, Nashville, and Tampa Bay, and he had the foresight to beat the NFL into Vegas, which has become a hockey mad town. And he let the Jets back in the sandbox, so hard to hate on that.
PK Subban - rival we boo because he's a bit of a diva, a diver, a bit chippy, and a self-promoter. But mostly because he is really good. Plus he donated $10 million of his salary to a children's hospital, and his self-promotion is as much about growing the game as his own brand. Actually a pretty classy guy with the fans - grudging respect for a guy we'd adore if he was a Jet.
Rod Black - He's a hyper broadcaster with a penchant for goofy nicknames, which rubs many the wrong way. And his interview skills can be downright embarrassing. But it's all in service of selling the CFL. He is an ardent booster, and does not play favorites. He likes to sell the players as stars as well as promote the teams, which is how the NFL broadcasts have always done it. Can appreciate what he is trying to do if not a fan of how it comes across on the TV. I have no issue with him. Flame away.
Saskatchewan Roughriders fans - Hey, stop throwing things at me! I know I am in the severe minority, but simply put, I don't waste any time going to their message board to listen to their chatter about how they get screwed over, that they are owed respect, that they are the greatest team ever, or whatever else most on this board tell me they are up to. I can't be bothered to care. They are die-hard fans who are one of the strongest franchise models in the CFL and support their team through thick and thin in a community model that encompasses the whole province. And I personally have never had an issue with any of them at a Banjo Bowl, Labour Day game of otherwise. hey have always been courteous and welcoming to me when I have been the same to them. Bitter rivals for sure, but no personal animosity.
My list (subject to change over time):
The mild annoyances -
0.25 - Paul Edmonds as a hockey play-by-play guy - too wordy for a fast sport like hockey. Was perfect for baseball and the storytelling it requires. Would be better as an analyst.
0.25 - Dallas Cowboys - no real hate, but as a Niners fan this is kind of a lifetime achievement award. Makes for fun dinner conversation with my Texan wife.
0.5 - Miami Heat - for ruining basketball with the "buy a superteam" model which is now what all teams want to do. Fortunately, I have pretty much zero interest in basketball, so it scores low
0.5 - Buffalo Bills - for making me sit through 3 more lousy Super Bowls after they choked in the first one, and taunted America when they kept getting back there despite everyone praying for new blood. "We're Back. Deal with it, America" Best comeback to that was this sign at the Super Bowl "0-4. Deal with it, Buffalo"
0.5- Seattle Seahawks - for the L.O.B. arrogance and Richard Sherman's trash talk after knocking out my beloved Niners. For Marshawn Lynch and his "I'm here just so I won't get fined" media scrum nonsense. For Pete Carroll not running the ball and handing those stinking Patriots a Super Bowl. For thinking that neon lime green looks good in a uniform. One hate point for each, but 2 love points back for their loud fans and the ORIGINAL 12th fan claim, and retiring that jersey #12 for them, and 1.5 love points for drafting a one-armed defensive back who is a great player and a greater human being and role model.
0.5 - soccer players who dive, and the soccer refs who refuse to card them for unsportsmanlike conduct. I only care every 4 years at a World Cup.
0.5 - anthem singers who can't be bothered to learn the melody or words of the anthem they are going to sing. This is not about nervousness, You have one job!
0.5 - anthem singers who turn the song into a lounge act. Aretha Franklin once took 4 minutes, 53 seconds to sing the Star Spangled Banner. Queen of Soul, King of the World, I don't care. That is nonsense.
0.5 - The entire Sportsnet hockey panel. well, maybe just Nick Kypreos mainly. But I have a mute button on my remote, so hate is fleeting.
0.5 - Darren Dutchyshyn - I dunno, he just has that kind of punchable face, you know? And WTF is "Roof daddy????" Hear he's a bit of a hothead too, possibly because of pharmaceutical enhancements to his physique?
Homer broadcasters
0.5 - Rick Jannearet (Sabres) - there's homers, there's annoying catchphrases, and there is over the top hyperactivity. He covers all the bases with a nasally high-pitched tone. But he is honest about his boosterism. Fairly innocuous.
1.0 - Johnny Most (Celtics) - this guy truly BELIEVES the world is out to get the greatest team ever, the Celtics, and worships at the altar of Larry Bird. Take it down about 5 notches, Johnny.
1.5 - Rod Peterson - a blatant homer and provocateur, the worst thing is he deep down knows this is just an act to provoke a response from haters, but he still unapologetically buys his own hype and goads those who don't get on board. More unprofessional than the blind homer.
Sports parents
0.5 Bonnie Lindros - If I lived in Quebec City, would have a much higher score. Once told the Team Canada head coach "Eric has the flu, I'm sending Brett to practice instead". Since the Big E is a distant memory, most of my hate is symbolic for the "ugly generic hockey mom"
0.5 - Richard Williams - Couldn't stand his mouth or his "match-fixing" between his daughters in tennis finals, but with Venus gone and Serena alone on top, he has largely disappeared.
1.0 - Earl Woods - raised a phenom, but sad he couldn't have devoted the same time and attention to his other 4 kids or his first 3 wives. And Earl , your son's a golfer, not Jesus. Hated the branding of Tiger as the latter. Hated the media even more for lapping it up (see further down on my list).
1.5 LaVar Ball - If you run your mouth, flout college rules, say you could beat Jordan one-on-one, and boast that your kids are the next superstars of the league, then you'd better deliver. Or at least keep them from getting arrested in Asia for shoplifting and using the President to bail them out. Again, media, why do you give this clown air time?
Part 2 in a bit, when I get into some more serious hatred.